A Short Guide
TAOISM - Shit happens.
CONFUCIANISM - Confucius say: "Shit happens".
CALVINISM - Shit happens because you don't work hard enough.
BUDDHISM - If shit happens, it really isn't shit.
SEVENTH DAY ADVENTIST - No shit on Saturdays.
ZEN - What is the sound of shit happening?
HEDONISM - There's nothing like a good shit happening.
HINDUISM - This shit happened before.
MORMON - This shit is going to happen again.
ISLAM - If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
MOONIES - Only happy shit happens.
STOICSM - This shit is good for me.
PROTESTANTISM - Let the shit happen to someone else.
CATHOLICISM - Shit happens because you are bad.
HARE KRISHNA - Shit happens rama rama.
JUDAISM - Why does this shit happen to us?
ZOROASTRIANISM - Shit happens half the time.
CHRISTIAN SCIENCE - Shit is in your mind.
ATHEISM - Don't believe in shit.
EXISTENTIALISM - What is shit anyway?
RASTAFARIANISM - Let's smoke this shit!